Posted by: Nanook | February 11, 2010

Front Page News

Oh Arkansas news. I realize that a trend is starting, and God knows I hate being repetitive. But oh Arkansas news. I realize that a trend is starting, and God knows I hate being repetitive, but you’re making it way too easy on me. You keep tossing me these softballs, and you’re going to make me lazy.

Unfortunately, Lazy Smurf actually has un-diagnosed mono, and will soon be dead.

On the front page of today’s Arkansas Democrat Gazette comes this bombshell:

front page news

This article on dog-coat-gate left me with more questions than answers. In need of further information, I visited the Gazette’s online site, which thankfully had a more in-depth article on this travesty. According to the on-line story, the woman went into the store for two minutes, and then “heard a “funny bark.” When McPherson went outside, she found the little white dog shivering. His green wool coat, with leather trim and belt, were nowhere in sight. McPherson said the dog coat was worth $25. She said that, fortunately, Lexie wasn’t wearing his pricier Burberry.”

Two things:
1. Why does the article describe the leather trim and belt? Are people really going to be on the lookout for this coat?
2. This dog, Lexie, sounds like kind of a spoiled bitch.

I have difficulty understanding why this is front page news. I could understand if someone like Donald Trump’s dog got mugged, but a quick Google search shows that Donna McPherson is a relative nobody–just a sad old woman who likes to dress her dog up.

Animal Cruelty

In fact, this whole story is beginning to smell fishy to me. Too many things just don’t add up. I’d be willing to bet that “Donna McPherson” wasn’t even this woman’s real name. Probably just a clever alias given to the newspaper.

Not quite as clever as this guy's, who appeared in the Fargo Forum earlier this year.

And yes, this entire post was written solely to give me the opportunity to post the Heywood Jablome photo. That Smurf joke? That was just gravy. You are welcome, America.

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Responses

  1. Loves it.

  2. Poor Davis Wallis (from The Forum). I’m pretty sure that someone had to sit him down and explain in detail that Mr Jablome might not have been entirely truthful with him.

  3. And here I thought Travis putting Guinness (our dog) in a wig and sunglasses was cruel punishment.

  4. But still, you never answer the question and America cries out to know: Woodja?

  5. “Hey very cool website!! Man .. Excellent .. Amazing .. I’ll bookmark your blog and take the feeds also…I am happy to find a lot of useful information here in the post, we need develop more strategies in this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .”


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