Oh Arkansas news. I realize that a trend is starting, and God knows I hate being repetitive. But oh Arkansas news. I realize that a trend is starting, and God knows I hate being repetitive, but you’re making it way too easy on me. You keep tossing me these softballs, and you’re going to make me lazy.
On the front page of today’s Arkansas Democrat Gazette comes this bombshell:
This article on dog-coat-gate left me with more questions than answers. In need of further information, I visited the Gazette’s online site, which thankfully had a more in-depth article on this travesty. According to the on-line story, the woman went into the store for two minutes, and then “heard a “funny bark.” When McPherson went outside, she found the little white dog shivering. His green wool coat, with leather trim and belt, were nowhere in sight. McPherson said the dog coat was worth $25. She said that, fortunately, Lexie wasn’t wearing his pricier Burberry.”
1. Why does the article describe the leather trim and belt? Are people really going to be on the lookout for this coat?
2. This dog, Lexie, sounds like kind of a spoiled bitch.
I have difficulty understanding why this is front page news. I could understand if someone like Donald Trump’s dog got mugged, but a quick Google search shows that Donna McPherson is a relative nobody–just a sad old woman who likes to dress her dog up.
In fact, this whole story is beginning to smell fishy to me. Too many things just don’t add up. I’d be willing to bet that “Donna McPherson” wasn’t even this woman’s real name. Probably just a clever alias given to the newspaper.
And yes, this entire post was written solely to give me the opportunity to post the Heywood Jablome photo. That Smurf joke? That was just gravy. You are welcome, America.