I love reading the personal messages in the classified ads. The people writing the messages are very passionate, but due to the costs associated with placing an ad, they are also forced to be quite thrifty. The results can be hilarious, or hauntingly beautiful. When read aloud, the classified syntax can be almost poetical.
For example, this ad, which appeared in ye olde Arkansas Democrat Gazette over the weekend. Whether done purposefully or not, the post is actually a haiku until the last line. A racist, paranoid haiku.
MUSLIM KILLED Soldier
You get to pay his Lawyer.
Justice? James Lovette, Little Rock
Oh James Lovette–you beautiful, beautiful bastard.